December 31, 2008

because you need to say okay.


so... did you have fun in '08?


i don't know why... but this question is just completely mind boggling for me. because i don't have a right answer. i don't exactly have an answer either. when that question surfaced, i went into a little reminiscing mode on my own.


2008.
ah gee where do i start...


i've experienced so much... that it is actually hard for me to absorb it all. i'm gonna blurt out everything that i remember randomly so... sue me.


the death of a loved one.
and not just any loved one, but the man who helped bring me into this world.


rejection.
and not just any rejection, but rejection from someone that i love so dearly and wish he hadn't.


torn friendships.
and not just any friendships, but the ones that were born four years ago.


self-doubt.
and not just any self-doubt, but the one that makes you cry and blame yourself when you look in the mirror.


intense physical pain.
and not just any physical pain, but the one that gives cuts and bruises, the one that leaves scars, the one that involves needles and the one that requires you to get a brainscan.


emotional pain.
do i even need to start on this? xD
involves all of the listed above.


i never knew a year could be THIS shitty... but come to think of it, because it was literally the worst year of my life so far, some things were pretty neat and made me smile more than i ever did before.


i made new friendships.
i secured a few friendships.
i rekindled old friendships.


i finished the year off with camp!
definitely one of the top silver linings.


i amazingly, lost/broke my phone and other phones xD numerous times... but still somehow, most of them manage to remain in my hands. i think because both phones were bought by my dad. teehee



i've became a sudoku addict ;p
i've started jogging on a good 3-4 days a week basis.


this year has been so eye-opening, i don't even believe that it is already ending. i have so much to cherish from this year yet so many bitter memories i wish would disappear. but i guess that is what makes life so interesting; the ups and downs and the curves and the straight roads... they somehow, magically create an immensely unique and beautiful picture at the end of the day :)


i'm going to say okay,
and move on to the following year.
and i'm going to be ready,
for whatever 2009 has for me.


happy new year, folkees!


so tell me
when its not alright
when its not okay
would you stick with me through whatever?
or run away?


Say Okay- Vanessa Hudgens

December 30, 2008


YVONNE CRIED.
sorry la but i will remember this day until my next hayat because of it


congratulations to all the PMR candidates!
woohoo i'm so the bangga of all of you! :)


i felt bad, seeing tears not because of happiness, but mostly because of heartbreak. i remember seeing them last year and i couldn't think of what to say because my tears were tears of joy. waaay different yaw.


to those straight A students that owe me meals;
next year i'm claiming them :D


in half an hour, i will be leaving home,
to wake Yvonne up i hope :D

December 28, 2008

because Malaysians have no common courtesy?


i believe this topic has raised eyebrows before as most reactions will be more of a 'HAAA?' more than a 'YAAA'. am i right or am i right? and sue me lah, as i'm going to write about my own experience with it.


a few days ago,
i was going to board the LRT from the Wangsa Maju station. my mom dropped me off and being in a less than good mood, she rushed off to her destination. i was given RM10 earlier but somehow, it wasn't in my bag or my jeans pocket. or in the black wallet from Vietnam. i only had loose change approximately RM1.70. i literally needed 50 more cents to purchase my ticket.


calling my mom would be like calling the devil.


being unable to contact anyone phone rosak at the best time, seriously and being late already, i was only left with one choice;




ask from a stranger.
i mean, come on.. all i needed was fifty bloody cents.


there i stood, stoned cold as heck....
as i stared and gave a mental evaluation to every.single.person that walked in and out of the station.


i don't understand why i couldn't just settle for a random person and ask for the 50c nicely and be done with it. nooooo~ i stood there for almost half an hour. should i ask the counterguy? should i ask the hotlink person? should i ask that short ol' lady? or that shabby looking youngster?


because all of their faces were like this;
*.*


takde expression. takde feeling. takde.
almost like they were in some trance of their own,
rushing to their destinations.




after a while, i could feel that someone was staring at me from afar.
this man... a foreigner, i kid you not, was walking towards my direction from meters berjauhan and he was staring right at me. sumpah i panic like crazy thinking dey what this guy want from me sort of thing.


he walked up closer and closer to me...
he had a very simple grin in his face...
i, still in panic mode...
and he said...


hi.
very sincerely.
very cool.
very casually.
almost harmless, it seemed.


he went to the shop behind me and bought a magazine or something. then he walked back out and slowly stood next to me. he asked whether i was waiting for someone and with the hint of expression on his face, it was obvious that he was also asking why my face looked stoned as heck. he was very tall, looked like a younger, slightly blonder version of Adam Sandler and spoke in an almost Kazakhstan accent.


very ala Tom Hanks in The Terminal.


because all the Malaysians around me didn't even bother to throw a smile on their faces, i guess my only option was to speak to Mr rather-nice Stranger. i let him know of my silly situation of needing just 50 more cents to board the train and he actually paid attention to me while i was speaking, still shaky and laughing at how goofy i was sounding.


oh... okeh okeh... *takes out wallet* here, i give you ( RM1 ) is that ah okeh?
OMG THANK YOUUUH~
your welcome, your welcome... if you want the more, i can give..
oh no no its alright this will do i'm good. you waiting for someone?
yes yes, i am.. :]
well thanks again! thank you!
ah you're welcome, you're welcome *initiates a wave goodbye*


i felt bad for ending the conversation that he striked up. but i was already late like crazy. if i wasn't, i think i would've just stayed and talked. i know mommy said don't talk to strangers, but i couldn't help the fact that he was the only stranger who bothered to ask.


really,
how many Malaysians do you know... be it, youngster, middle aged, old... actually smiles at you or the least, nod as he/she walks passes you by a roadside, or in the very means of your own neighbourhood area? i know only one person who does that and she was the one who inspired me to just have common courtesy, when i'm jogging around my area with the dog or simply walking from my house to another.


now, i find it hard for myself not to nod or flash a little smile when i am walking pass somebody in my neighbourhood area. i also find it hard to believe that the only people who do the same thing when i'm out and about on the streets of KL, are all foreigners. never have i encountered a Malaysian who instead of just staring and looking away, looks at me or anyone and gives a warm-hearted smile.


if showing it is so hard, can you imagine saying it?
the simple thank yous and your welcomes..
would't give you herpes, would it?


here's a good story on how that is very obviously normal in our society.
just a few days ago, i was waiting at the bus stop opposite the Wangsa Maju station another train station story for my mother to pick me up. i saw with my own eyes, on the direct opposite of the road, a blind man holding his walking stick struggling his way to the station.


an estimation of probably thirty people(?) were walking around him, pass him, behind him… mostly youngsters.. and all of them just stared and buat bodoh!


typical common courtesy to just help to guide the poor ol' man..is that so hard to do? because if i were standing there, i would have helped without a doubt. i’m a youngster myself and it makes me feel ashamed that a lot of us never learnt from the Pendidikan Moral that was taught to us throughout our schooling life. tak pernah tengok picture of young teenager helping pakcik buta cross road ah? what could he do? sumbat his stick up your nose for talking to him?


seriously.
why are we so ignorantly bland and blank?
mulut terlalu berat ke?



well what do you think?
have society lost its sense of common courtesy,
or have we never possessed it anyway?


Circus- Britney Spears

December 27, 2008

because my heart is racing.

some people.....
have absolutely nothing to do with their lives.


yet i see my life changing as well.
:)


that feeling
oh that wonderful feeling


O Holy Night- Kelly Clarkson

December 26, 2008

because i had a bright christmas.


my Christmas and Christmas Eve was
AMAZING :)


Christmas Eve.

went up to Genting at night to watch the New York Harlem singers.



sumpah damn powerful maan.
it was almost like being in an African-American based church, except that there was no choir. just five lead singers and two on the instruments. my ticket was waaay up front; directly behind the VIP seats. so many times, the singer(s) would take a glance at my area. *perasanism alert* sometimes i think the singer(s) was looking directly at me :D


i reached home at 1 in the morning.
12, i was still in the car on the way down.
no snow in sight, but at least it was chilly and cold :)

Christmas Day.

from church to Sarah's to Edna's.
left home at nine, reached home at 9.




i got a plenty of little presents! thank you thank you thank you all you kind samaritans who actually took the time to go Christmas shopping, unlike me. but i still found it a little ironic that 90% of my presents were treats! cookies, chocolates chocolates chocolates, sweets and more treats. which were mostly finished by Ranjali haha


the closest present to Christmas was a gingerbread cookie in the shape of a Christmas tree. with cute and colourful icing on it. hah. felt more like Halloween, thinking back of that little pouch of candy.


basically, i spent Christmas with family :), hanging out with beloved friends, hanging out with new friends, and catching up with good ol' friends. though, i still need to get a present for my mom and a few other people. NGAHH


i'm supposed to be watching this right now. :(


the tickets are completely sold out. COMPLETELY. laku siall~ well, i can't be completely surprised because the director of the play, Christopher Ling, was my kidsCAT director for four years. :D and he's really an amazing person with such a huge flow of creativity and imagination. i'm happy for him for making it so far and hopefully, even further.


i remember during my last year of kidsCAT, i played one of the lead angels with SoonYi. and he actually stopped us while we walking to and fro in the stadium after our play and said this;


'i really am very proud of the both of you in particular and i really, really believe both of you will go such a long way.'


then he asked if he could pray for the both of us, and we ended up crying at the end hahaha whatta moment :)


hope your Christmas was good.
i surely loved mine. *big happy grin*


o holy night
the stars are brightly shining


White Christmas- Taylor Swift

December 23, 2008

because i want to enjoy life.

i had a fun day out with the Zen, the Tang, Potassium Hydroxide and Wigman. :)


went to watch Wild child,
starring Emma Watson Roberts


i still cannot get the picture of her dancing and if you call that krumping, well up to you out of my head. it was so.... weird. her hands were so dingly dangly and she didn't like hit it enough. at least take some dancing lessons first or at least, go clubbing and observe the way real biatches get it on.


i like that its not a typical chickflick.
worth the RM9 which was paid by Edna xD thank you!


but i've been so used to seeing Emma play goody goody roles.
Aquamarine, Unfabulous, Nancy Drew not like i watched this one but still...


i can't see her be real butch and bitch.
its just really weird.
and it can't seem to translate right.


also maybe because i have too much of a high expectation from her, the fact that her aunt is one of the most respected actresses of all time? x)


----------------------------------------------------------------------------

i'm in 5 freaking Azam, babehhhh~

not only am i happy that i will be having the best teachers, i am even happier that i'm gonna be in the same class with so many of my good and fun friends. most i've been in the same class with in form1, 2, 3 but eventually got seperated. and some i've been wanting to know better. whee :D *skippidies around*


and to make many lives easier,
i took pictures of the list.

5 Azam 09




5 Bina 09



5 Cekal 09


this better be the second best high school year for me :)





*lets out a good sigh*
i guess life can turn from tears to smiles in just a day.


Tak Bisakah- Peterpan

December 22, 2008

looks like this whole day is just a pool of tears.


hah.
and thinking that going for a long jog and cycle would calm these nerves down.


seriously, you know.
why apologize hor?
you didn't do anything wrong.
you didn't even mean it.


just walk off with that stupid bitch face of yours and act as if nothing ever happened.


thats how you fucked up people are.
thinking you're always, always, always fucking right.


has it ever once crossed your mind that a single word can make a big difference? apologizing could just change the whole situation? has it ever once crossed your mind that daddy died because of your i-don't-care-about-how-anyone-else-feels-but-me attitude?


'how is it my fault? i didn't do anything wrong.'


thats right.
you never do anything fucking wrong.
coz you're so dammit perfect.


call me an anti-social?
i just don't want or bother wasting my time to continue taking care of how you and you feel. and whoever else that unfortunately has the same attitude as the both of you.


i thank God i learnt from my dad.
i thank God i learnt about humility and self-realization.
i thank God i learnt to have a heart.


i thank God so much that no matter how far i go or where i am,
i know i will never ever think the same way as you do.



selfish.
arrogant.
imbeciles.


stare longer at the mirror, okay?
then you'll see that you're just like everyone of us.
wow.
i really do make my life miserable.



its weird how 90% of the times in my life when i cry,
i would be in front of this computer.


soaking up the new keyboard.
drip. drip. drip.


i wonder and wonder
will i ever stop being the only one
playing this game of pity?

because this time, its different.


ooo chee~

someday, i'd be listening to the original maayn ;D
*look at the song i'm listening*


i have a strong need of wanting to hear the lyrics.
please oh please post up the full song :)


i still can't believe i was wrong,
but this time, i'm not tempted to fall



Not Tempted To Fall ( Instrumental )- Sherlina

December 21, 2008

because of amazement.


and the boy just collapsed wholly to the ground on his knees; his face smothered in his pale hands and forehead reaching the marble floor. he started crying out loud, louder than i have ever heard from him. i stood there still. cold. tears. still, in awe of Him and His overwhelming presence.


DυмdυмnιqÏ…e™ says:
nevermind la
DυмdυмnιqÏ…e™ says:
i wanna drive car asap
JuYi says:
HAHAHAHAHA then you can totally drive me man
JuYi says:
i'm a psychotic maniac when i'm in the car
JuYi says:
meaning; i can never ever ever drive a car ever in my life
JuYi says:
heh ;p
DυмdυмnιqÏ…e™ says:
yeah right juyiiiii
DυмdυмnιqÏ…e™ says:
u'll be my first passenger in my car la k?
DυмdυмnιqÏ…e™ says:
xD




i hereby call all of you readers to be bystanding evidence to the fact that Amanda Tan says that i WILL be her first passenger in her car once she gets her license!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------


Christmas is in four days.
i'm afraid i'm going to be lonely on that day :(


but hey school begins in two weeks.
did anyone think of that? ;p


i was in Dorene's car next to JiaLi on the way back from church and then we reminisced on our form1 and form2 days. and i told her about how i remember being twelve; sitting quietly yes i was a quiet girl when i was younger to myself as i stared at the kakak-kakak senior in the light blue school uniforms, carrying a heavyload of History and Addmath yuck textbooks. back then, all i carried in my bag was my pencil-stained pencil case, a really cool black shoulder and roller bag ( dwi-functional yaww ;p) and lbp- little black pinafore.


wah~
i will die in form5.
-somewhat, what ran through my mind at that time





i am form 5. in two weeks.
will i die in form5?


i honestly never imagined this day to come. the day where i am actually a senior in the school i have been attending the past four years of my life. the year which would be my last, spent in the beautiful Sekolah Menengah Kebangsaan Seksyen 5. the time where it would be my last putting on the light blue school uniform, the exact same one that the kakak-kakak senior wore.


feels like just yesterday, holding my PMR result slip.
feels like just yesterday, stepping for the first time into secondary school.
feels like just yesterday that i came to know some of the greatest friendships i have.
and soon...


it feel will just like yesterday, taking my last step in secondary school.
i can't say i await that day,
i can't say i don't either.


amazed at how time flies.
amazed at how life goes. :)


Party In Your Bedroom- Cash Cash

December 20, 2008

because i'm in the Vergara's residence.

*sigh*
the phone's completely lost it.
now the Internet's lost it.


i feel completely disconnected from my technological world.
*tsktsk*

------------------------------------------------------------------------

however,
my connection with God just grew a little bit stronger. :)


NexGen's Xtreme Camp was... well, very much like its name.
extreme it definitely was.


being a well-known camwhore, i am now still contemplating on the fact of how i do NOT have any.single.photo in my camera from the 4days 3nights camp at NS site, Benom Hill, Pahang. also, being a well-known loud and can-be-considered-daring public speaker, i am now still figuring out why i didn't go up to the mike stand on the last day to share my testimony with the other 100+ campers.



no balls, you say?
was just scared i'd forget what i intended to say.
you know.. and then start mumbling unrelated gibberish.
alaa you know, the typical JuYi riiight.
itu sajeee ;p


so, i shall share my testimony via my favourite internet page,
my blog. :)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

hello. my name is JuYi. i'm sixteen. :)


it is my first time coming to Metro's church camp. also, i'm quite new among you NexGenners so... show face lah okay? x) i have been to a church camp but that was four years ago. so i have almost completely forgotten how it feels to be in a four day camp which involves fun and God at the same time.


at first, when i read that the camp is named as Xtreme, i laughed it off a little bit laa. being a half tomboy in nature, i thought you know.. it wouldn't be considered that Xtreme for me. but first day itself, i could feel the nerves of my shoulders and arms crying. jungle trekking was intense; obstacle course was EVEN more intense. and my arms just continued aching from that day onwards. all in all, the activities were very VERY extreme. i am beyond satisfied xD


the food is also bloody awesome.
the toilet... i'm not so sure.
but i am 100% sure that i will be volunteering for NS 2010 and God willing, i hope to be in the first batch and camping here. :D


i registered for this camp with a.. very normal expectation. not a big one, not a small one. somehow, i wasn't sure what to expect from the camp either. i was really hungry for an answer, a voice, a vision.. i wasn't lost, but i wasn't quite found either. i wasn't backsliding, but i wasn't quite full front either. i just really didn't know what to expect but i wanted to be ready.


in my last camp, i only really responded on the camp's last night. here, i felt God's message come right through during every workshop and every each of Pastor Ryan's sermons am i allowed to call them sermons? xD .


on the first night, it was about.. whether we mean what we sing. whether we truly love God more than our life. i pondered upon that question for very long and am still thinking about it. i am very sure that i would do alot of things for Him but would i have a limit? would i be too scared of what the world's opinion was towards me? do i really love God more than my life?


the message on extreme poverty.
hit me very hard as well.


because it reminded me of how the greatest poverty is the feeling of being unwanted, unloved and uncared for. it reminded me of how poverty is not only experienced by the poor slums of Dharvani, India or the sick in the depths of South Africa but also the very humans around us. our brothers, sisters, friends, parents... it could be anyone. for it is the type of poverty that cannot be seen with the naked eye, nor felt with the hand. it reminded me to not be afraid or hold back from showing love and compassion.


on the last night,
God's presence was just beyond description. i could feel Him speaking to me through Pastor Ryan. i mean... wow, God really really knows me. its not a joke and its not a hoax! honestly, what other proof is there that He is real? He also opened up my eyes to an answer that i have been searching for in the past terrible months. i can finally let out my last sigh. i can finally breathe like nothing is ever holding me back from doing so. this feeling is completely magical and without God, i'd probably never feel this way.


truly truly truly,
i will never forget all the things that i have seen, learnt and felt throughout this camp. i have made new friends, i have gotten closer to old friends. i may have gotten an answer from God but i will continue seeking Him and praying about it. i really believe that i will walk away a changed person. and i look forward to what He has in store for me for the year of 2009. :)


Over The Rainbow- Katherine Mcphee

December 13, 2008

kerana rindu.


i'm now typing using an on-screen keyboard.
SUMPAH damn pelik and annoying.

yes, my desperation to blog is that serious.



my actual keyboard's actually out.
the motherboard is really losing its grip already.
guess it time for a new computer :(



*shameless plug alert*
this computer was a first prize i won single-handedly when i was 10 or 11 in a KL spelling bee competition. i beat a really smart 12 year old boy who comes to think of it, looked like sw's Mr Debator xD

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------


i'l be leaving for the NexGen camp tomorroooow~
:DD


here's something i'd like you people to guess until i come home this Wed.
tell me what is wrong with this picture below;

Chandler from Friends


trust me.
i didn't and couldn't notice until a sharp observer pointed it out to me
Mei, you're not allowed to answer xD


what to do
rindu en


Circus- Britney Spears

December 9, 2008


oh then we just yelled at each other and i threw the phone to the floor and my mom had to get involved in it and yell at the first person she sees do something wrong. obviously, me.


again, the classic sister moments.

omg jiejie, i got a dress!
*runs down to look at it* wow it is pretty. can i wear it? :D
NO!
oh like you haven't worn any of my dresses before?
.... noooo.....
well, do you think you can wear that dress?
NOOOOO *sulks*


one of my priceless sister moments. =)

because reminiscence is continuous.


my sister's 14th birthday party is in progress at this very second.
ohmyGANJA the noise, the crowd, the food...


such hatred and love i have for it.
reminds me all of my 14th birthday.
remember who i kissed? ahak xP


eating eating eating EATING
someone got injured during one of the games.
kissing occurs during the birthday cake session i'm assuming
noisily lepak-ing in the playground
people scattered EVERYWHERE


ahh gee.
what memories from two years ago.


now i won't be around on the actual date of the day my sister was unfortunately born, so...


HAPPY BIRTHDAY, WONG JU ANN :)
please stop being so bitchy. i'd appreciate it SO MUCH as your less-and-almost-non-bitchy sister. and you were the first person who asked for the dog, so take better care of it. and when you become famous chef already, don't forget your sister. who loves you despite the fact that you're fat and so annoying. blah

-----------------------------------------------------------------

i appreciate the fact that you called.
and apologized.
for the things you said.


but i'm not ready to make nice yet.
so a little it longer,
and i'll be fine.


i promise.

December 8, 2008

because of broken hopes and hearts.


why laa must you make your life miserable?


because i am done with being replaced.
one after another.


i thought it was going to stop.
i thought having two people do it to me was already enough.
i thought i wouldn't have to go through the same heartbreak again.


but it seems like third time's a charm, isn't it?


its like the same cycle of tears.
just a deeper level of heartache.


i'm not a recyclable piece of garbage.
you don't throw me away,
and then take me back when i'm needed.


i'm not making my life miserable.
i'm just gonna quit putting my hope and trust
in the people i truly love,

because someday,
you will be replacing me as well.


Insufficient Love- Raymond Lam

December 6, 2008

because we still got time.




KUALA LUMPUR: A massive landslide occurred in Bukit Antarabangsa at 3:30am Saturday. As of 2.20pm Saturday, three people are confirmed dead and 15 injured.


The landslide cut off access by the main road to the residential areas at Bukit Antarabangsa, trapping hundreds of residents.



As of 2.20pm Saturday, more than 2,000 residents have been evacuated, said Inspector-General of Police Tan Sri Musa Hassan.


He added that the search and rescue operation is ongoing for six people who are suspected to be buried but still alive.


On Saturday monring, Selangor police chief Datuk Khalid Abu Bakar said the military has been roped in to create a slip road to enable trapped victims to be evacuated from the area.


As of 2.30pm Saturday the police had airlifted six people who needed immediate medical attention - two pregnant women, two elderly women with weak hearts, a man who is a stroke patient and another man who needed haemodialysis treatment.

The rain is not helping. The area covered by landslide is more than 10 acres,” he told reporters at a press conference near the site on Saturday afternoon. Those who have been evacuated were sent to Sekolah Kebangsaan Ulu Klang. Food and shelter will be provided there.


Khalid said as of now, there are 14 teams with dogs and electronic equipment trying to locate the missing victims. “After 5pm, it will be 12 hours (since the incident happened early Saturday morning). We will start using heavy machinery to find those still stuck in the rubble.


----------------------------------------------------------------------------



i'm sure many of you know that Adrian Wong and his family live in the vicinity. thank God they are perfectly safe and were evacuated earlier this morning. thank God as well that their home is not among the ones that were affected. they just came back to my house a few minutes ago after packing up their clothes and other necessities from their home. they'd probably be staying at my place for a couple of nights.


The whole massacre is just… completely unthinkable.



what would happen if your home was taken away from you?

if your loved one was taken away from you like this?






i can't imagine what it is like for Adrian and his family. they're sitting quietly in my living room, awaiting hourly updates of the landslide on tv1. to be thinking that your home is no longer safe to live in; to be thinking that your home just might be affected anytime soon if another landslide occurs... the horror is not something i want to be a part of.




if i'm not mistaken, Pn Ratna lives there as well. and i would really really like to know if she and her family are okay.


all we can do now is pray.

December 5, 2008

Happy Birthday Tang Siu Wern :D

December 4, 2008

Happy Birthday Lee Mei Ying :D
it was supposed to be 11:59!

kerana gua perlukan itu beg!


as many of us are...well... bagaholics,
bags are to women as balls are to men.

ain't this a pretty black plait tote? ;D *hint hint!*


we carry it around just as a mere accessory to show off, but without it, we feel naked and incomplete.


thats how i feel right now.
naked... and just incomplete.


and so, i decide to write a letter to Alice in Wonderland to let her know my frustration and deep depression.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

dear Alice,


a few days ago, i followed an AHdorable little brown rabbit....

i assume it was your fluffy friend


who disappeared into a nearby rabbit hole. I followed him like a brainless sakai and i tergolek-golek into the burrow, nearly breaking my neck... but when i opened my eyes, i was in such awe i nearly fainted in spot and died.


i was in the world of Wonderland!
it was filled with BAGS!


clutches, slingbags, shoulder bags, TOTES...
it was bag nirvana.
and the bags are seriously the best i have ever seen.




i also went to the Mad Tea Party as i was invited by Miss E-Shopaholic. and i couldn't help but cry looking at all the pretty bags that were on sale! the thing is, i forgot to bring my purse and i don't have much money. my 16th birthday was two months ago and i spent it in the hospital so i guess we can forget about that special day. :( *wipes tears with white poofy dress*


so my dearest Alice,
i pray that you can help Santa in granting my biggest Christmas wish;



to be able to own a bag,
from the beautiful world of Wonderland.



p.s; i've been a very good and obedient girl, honest!
i didn't ponteng kelas in school and i studied quite hard for my end-of-the-year exam.
i disobeyed mummy a little bit la but it was just a little bit!



Me solemnly swear me needs a bag from www.alicewonders.com

December 3, 2008

because you matter.


YOU, my friend.



you've put up with all of this crap for years already. and so, this year happens to be the worst of all shitfests. so what? you can put up with this! this is nothing! you're a tough cookie and God is looking after you. don't you fret and frust about all of this.


who says you don't have family?
you have me.
you have us.
we are your family.


promise me you will keep strong.

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YOU, my friend.


friends don't seem to be acting like... well, friends? well don't worry because you've got me. and you've got your other real friends as well. i know its hard but show them that you're better than them. if letting them go is the only choice, then let go. if they come back, take them in with open arms.


because after all, that is what a real friend is like.
accepting people even when they don't deserve it.


don't waste your energy with all this frustration. shake it off and take in some happiness and you'll be alright. :)

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YOU, my friend.


do you know how rare it is to find people like you? you are one of the only people i know who although is getting older, has not stopped believing in miracles. you believe in the good of people. and that is something that this generation is starting to lack.


i pray every night that there would be more people like you in this world. and obviously, God is slowly answering that prayer of mine.


you don't suck.
you're just different.


and that little difference in you is what makes you so special and stand out from the crowd. you're a great person and i wished more people could see it.

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YOU, my friends.

remember; after every downpour, there is a rainbow.
amd i sincerely love you. :)

because saya sudah sedia.


i've done it!
i've set up my own online boutique! *skippidies around*


visit Fashion Variety when its updated lah.
i have no pictures up yet but when i have, i'll of course blog about it here also riiight? ;D


i'm selling away my pre-owned items that are either too small or too big for me. heck, some never even been worn before! price is... boleh-boleh la, trust me. basically, just visit it when i have updated it okay? and if you're a real good samaritan, spread the word along. terima kasih, me fans and followers *gives away flying kisses*


if ya'll got any suggestions or tips, please do tell me. :D

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bila sudah habis patching semua, lepas confirm oral hygiene dah ok, you sudah boleh pakai braces, ye?
-a very nice nurse


i can't believe it.
i really am going to be wearing braces! xD


i went to the dentist this morning at 7.30a.m simply because its government and not private and had my first dental appointment. my trip in the LRT was definitely the highlight of the day. you know how the LRTs in the early morning are PACKEDLIKECRAP right? so from WMaju, i took the train back all the way to its last stop,Terminal Putra because its NOTSOPACKEDLIKECRAP.


then, like the other four hundred people in the train i'm exaggerating, we just stayed in the train and waited for it to go back in its opposite direction as it skips WMaju. my stop was Jelatek. and by that time, the train was already PACKEDLIKECRAP so i actually had difficulty getting out of the train!


strangers who wanted to go in the train actually had to help pull me out.
how fun is that? xD



i'll figure this one out
on my own



Decode- Paramore

December 1, 2008

because its not worth it. ala kidding lah.

spent THE WHOLE OMG AFTERNOON frolicking lifelessly in JJ, and then KLCC, and then back to JJ again!


screw you happy and excited people who are expecting birthday presents and wishes in this upcoming week. *sticks flam-ingested tongue out and hopes the virus somehow spreads to you*


well actually....
i don't have a life right now, really so..... =/
but hello thankyou to the people who teman-ed me ;D


begging for forgiveness; begging for me
just like i always wanted
but i'm so sorry


White Horse- Taylor Swift